Hermione in Lunaland
by BinBerries
Summary: Life is stressful, especially for Hermione Granger so Luna decides to take matters into her own hands
1. Chapter 1 : The Twins

Everything was dark.

One moment she fell asleep on her desk in her office, just to take a break from all the paperwork, and she wakes up and everything is all dark. The chair in front of her desk was gone, the file cabinet on her right was gone, the papers on her table was gone. Everything was gone except for her desk and the chair she fell asleep on.

The darkness was alarming, she immediately pulled her wand out of her pocket and whispered "_Lumos". _

A faint light appeared on the tip of her wand but it was useless. The darkness still remained.

Where in the world was she? Is someone pranking her? At the thought of pranks, she scoffed "Come on Fred, give it up! George! I know it's you bloody pricks, pranks over!" no response, normally they would snicker and give it up when Hermione sniffs them out.

"Hello Hermione"

She gasps and turns around, only one person owns that gently and dreamy voice. "Luna?" her eyes widen, _Luna did this? _"Luna, what's going on?"

"You know Hermione, you have many Nargles on you, you need to get rid of them". Luna tilted her head a bit to the side "I've been trying to help rid of them by coming by your office more often, it doesn't seem to be working".

That was true, Luna had been passing by Hermione's office ever since she and Ron broke up. Once in a while they would chat about the people in the office and share opinions on them, when Luna talks about the strange creatures she sees resulting in a snicker from Hermione, she leaves.

"I told you Luna, I don't even know what they are and I don't know how to get rid of them. We can talk about them though in my office, so let's just go back" Hermione tried to persuade Luna. "No Hermione, you need help, the Nargles irritate me. Trust me Hermione, this will help you" and with that, Luna vanished.

And so did the light on Hermione's wand.

"What? Fuck"

Before she could mutter the spell again, she was falling.

She screamed every spell she could but her hair kept covering her mouth. She continued to scream until she landed on a mattress.

"What the-"

Looking around, the walls seemed to be made of trees all stuck together, it'll be useless to try and squeeze between them. The floors were tiled, patterned black and white, and in the center of the room stood a glass table approximately 30 feet tall or more. The ceiling was probably 30 feet higher than the table.

Before she could question anything, she was in the Wizarding world, not the Muggle one. So technically anything is possible, questioning it will just make you as mad as a hatter.

She stood up and ran for the wooden door across her. Pulling on the handle, it wouldn't budge. She pulled out her wand _"Alohomora" _and tried the door again. Nothing, still locked. She tried again _"Aberto"_, trying the knob again, nothing.

"This is Ridiculous!" she looked up "Luna! Come on! I'm supposed to be at the Ministry! I have work to finish!"

Releasing a deep sigh, she turned maybe to rest on the mattress again but it was gone. There was a small box, containing what seemed to be biscuits. Her stomach grumbled, _I forgot I skipped lunch _which turned out to be a terrible decision, she seemed to be making plenty of those lately.

Hermione picked up the box and reluctantly sniffed the biscuits. Turning one of them to see the design of it, read '_Eat me'_

She looked up and found a key conveniently placed on the glass table that was incredibly too high for her to reach. Her magic wasn't working wherever she was so her wand is definitely not an option.

Wait a minute-

The falling, the table, the door, the key, the biscuits-

\- A month earlier –

_"What was your childhood like Hermione?" Luna asked out of nowhere, catching her off guard. "Quite normal, other than the accidental magic that scared off some people that could've been my friends" Hermione chuckled at her own memories. _

_"What did you do for fun?" Hermione gave her a look that said 'really? Isn't it obvious' but replied regardless "I read some books, but in my childhood I read fairytales". _

_"Fairytales? Like fantasy? Or magic like ours?" Hermione shook her head, "fairytales are muggle children stories, where there is always a happy ending and a moral to be learned". She smiled fondly at the memories, how her mother read the stories but fell asleep while reading only for her to read it herself. _

_"I've never heard of any of them" Luna adjusted her pink glasses "what was your favorite?" _

_Hermione scanned all the stories, what was her favorite? Remembering how amazed and fascinated she was reading about and coming to Hogwarts or the Wizarding world itself only one story came to mind._

_"Alice in Wonderland" she answered._

_"What was is about?" _

_Hermione set her papers aside, if she enjoyed reading she also liked telling the story herself. _

_"There was a little girl named Alice, and she wandered off following a rabbit into a rabbit hole-"she told Luna the story like how she had repeated the story to her mother over and over again when they would eat breakfast._

_When the story, and the questioning, was done Luna smiled at Hermione. "All the Nargles disappeared when you were telling the story" Hermione smiled and looked to the clock. "Oh my- Luna it's late! You should head home, I'll looks for a copy of the story and lend it to you tomorrow" _

_Luna nodded and stood from her chair, turning to leave but looked back at her "You know Hermione, maybe you should also visit Wonderland for a while"._

_Hermione smiled "it would be fun, to escape everything and just wander off. Good night Luna"_

_"Good night hermione"_

"Ughhh!" Hermione groaned in annoyance "Luna! I was joking! I wasn't being serious!" she glared at the biscuits "fine, if I finish this story then I can go home right? Okay Luna, I'll play".

She took a tiny nibble from the biscuit and immediately grew tall enough to reach the key on the table. "Got it" she smirked and grabbed the tiny bottle on the table, taking a tiny sip, she shrunk back to her normal size and unlocked the door. "Too easy" she chuckled and opened the door.

The sight was breathtaking. Neville would go crazy looking at all the beautiful leaves and flowers. It looked exactly how she imagined Wonderland would be like. She reached for one of the flowers gigantic flowers but they turn and gasp at her.

"Oh, silly me, I didn't realize-"

"What?" the tulip demanded "that the tulip it to be picked on? That you may choose all the other tulips in the garden and disregard me? All because I'm withering?"

_Geez, this flower has issues_

The flower continued to rant and chatter, Hermione continued on her way and moved along. _This is just a dream 'Mione, Luna is just giving you a really strange but realistic dream_.

"Well, well, well, would you look at what the cat dragged in"

Hermione turned to the familiar voices and scoffed

"What's so funny eh?" Fred asked pointing an accusing finger at her. "Yeah, it ain't polite to laugh at someone" George defended.

They were wearing the yellow and red stripped pants with suspenders, the yellow polo shirt with the light blue bow tie. Exactly like Tweedledee and Tweedledum. Including the hat with the tiny windmill on top.

"Seriously Luna? Fred and George, this is spectacular" she spoke and laughed.

The twins exchanged glances "who's Fred and George?" "I'm Tweedledee" said the not-Fred "and I'm Tweedledum" said the not-George.

"Yeah and I'm Alice" Hermione decided to play along with sarcasm dripping from her tone. "Hello Alice, good to meet you" not-Fred held out a hand "and make your acquaintance" not-George held out a hand, Hermione took both and laughed.

"So where ya headed Alice?" not-Fred sat on a log and patted the space beside him, not-George also sat on the log, still leaving a space between them for her to sit.

Hermione sat in between the twins "I'm looking for a white rabbit, I haven't seen him yet".

The twins stroked their chins, faking that they have a beard and Tweedledum (George) exclaimed "I think I've seen him!" then he shook his head "no, I haven't". Tweedledee (Fred) gasped "Ah! I think he went that way! No wait- maybe that way!"

"No Tweedledee, I think he went that way"  
"I don't think so, I think he went this way"  
"You'll get her lost"  
"No, YOU'll get her lost"

They continued to argue so Hermione stood to leave, "well I appreciate the effort, but I must be on my way". They then turned to face her and found her want sticking out of her pocket.

"Hm?" Tweedledee (Fred) picked the wand out of her pocket "what's this?"

Hermione was too late to grab it from his hands "give it back". "Oh?" Tweedledum (George) smirked "seems important to little Alice here" he took the wand from the other and chuckled. "What's so important with a stick?" Hermione was growing impatient "it's a wand so give it back". "Show us how it works" Tweedledee (Fred) crossed his arms.

"It doesn't work here" Hermione crossed her arms as well. "Then why should we believe you?" they spoke in unison "You're as mad as a hatter".

Hermione raised her eyebrow "I assume you know where he is then?" They both pointed to a path behind her. She grabbed her wand from their hands and turned "geez, annoying in real life annoying in wonderland too".

Following the path, she heard a song she knew too well.

"A very merry unbirthday to you!"

She chuckled, _I wonder who it is this time _she picked up her pace, eager to know which of her wizard friends or colleagues Luna imagined being the mad hatter.

_Harry? That would be hilarious, Ron? Too predictable, probably Dean or Seamus_

She got there as gasped, laughing too hard that her stomach began to hurt.

_Oh Luna, you are amazing_


	2. Chapter 2 : The Mad Hatter

Luna Lovegood made Draco Malfoy as the Mad Hatter.

This is just too good.

Once Hermione recovered from laughing and regained her composition, she opened the small gate that lead to the garden where the three Slytherins were having their tea party.

"A very merry unbirthday to you!" she saw the two faces whose voices they belonged to. Blaise Zabini and Theodore Nott.

Blaise and Theo, who she had presumed were the Dormouse and the March Hare, sang out loud as they waved their teacups spilling whatever content it had previously had. Malfoy though, didn't seem as mad at the two which was quite odd.

"Might I join your tea party?" her voice made the two stop singing and Malfoy, the Mad Hatter looked up to meet her eyes.

"Granger?" _wait what? he's normal? _

"Stranger?" Theo, the March Hare who had a headband with rabbit ears, piped up and lowered his cup. Well, he had slammed his cup down, causing the bottom part of the cup to shatter.

"Indeed a stranger!" Blaise,the Dormouse with whiskers on his face, shouted in a drunk manner but then looked back to Theo "Might I have some more tea my good man?". Theo jumped onto the table with the teapot in his hands "Of course my good sir!" pouring the tea but clearly missing Blaise's cup.

"Malfoy?" Hermione wondered out loud, it would've been funnier if he was just imaginary like the others and singing like them. What a sight that would've been.

"Oh thank God" Malfoy rose from his chair and walked around the whole table "everyone here is mad! I took a nap in my study and woke up in this bloody mad house! Theo and Blaise look like they're high on some sort of drug! They keep calling me Hatter! and I'm dressed like some sort of clown!".

Hermione didn't even bother to look at what she'd been wearing, looking down, she was wearing the exact blue dress Alice was in. Touching the top of her head, even the black ribbon completed the look. _Luna truly got everything by the book_.

She was giggling as she stared at Malfoy's outfit. The red top hat, dark maroon suit - which he looked fairly attractive in - but the shoes curling at the tips were hilarious. How she wished she had a camera to treasure this moment.

She continued to laugh and forgot Malfoy's presence. He shook her by the shoulders and shouted in her face "Granger! God please don't tell me you're mad too".

She shook her head "I'll explain, but let's have some tea shall we? you look tired".

"I- wha- Granger, this isn't funny I would like to return to my house" he continued to blabber like the prick he was but Hermione just proceeded to walk towards Blaise and Theo. She was already enjoying was Luna had given, not even Malfoy could ruin this story. "Take a seat hatter, you look more mad than usual" she used his signature smirk he often used at the Ministry and patted the chair where he was seated earlier.

"What's your name Miss?" Theo jumped off of the table, still holding the teapot in his hands "Alice, I'm Alice". "Ah yes, Ms. Alice, forgive our friend the Hatter, he's been quite grumpy lately" Theo giggled and so did Blaise as they glanced at Malfoy who grimaced almost as terribly as the Grinch.

"It's me, you daft- " before he could finish his sentence, Hermione nudged him with her elbow. "You don't suppose to know where I could find a white rabbit?" remembering clearly what happens after meeting with the tea party, Alice's original goal was to follow the white rabbit. Her only question was, who did Luna decide the white rabbit would be?

"White Rabbit? Ah, yes indeed" Theo stroked a his chin as he though "Any ideas, Mouse?". Looking at Blaise, who was already asleep with a snot bubble on his nose.

"I think he may have passed through here earlier-"  
"For fucks sake, Granger, if were looking for the man wearing the white rabbit ears headban he went there" Malfoy interrupted Theo, stood up and dragged her out of her chair "I'm tired of these people, you can explain everything to me on the way".

Luna suddenly appeared with a smile on her face, still wearing the pink glasses from earlier. "Hello Hermione" she said, in her normal soft voice.

"Luna!" Malfoy turned and release Hermione. "Listen Lovegood, I don't know what kind of messed up thing this is but you better-"

"Chesire Cat!" Theo exclaimed and threw one of the teapots in excitement "would you like some tea?". Luna held out one of the still-intact teacups and Theo picked up another teapot and poured whatever was inside to her cup.

"You still have the Nargles on you Draco," Luna sipped her tea "you should get rid of them, Hermione seems to be doing well in doing just that".

"What the hell is going on you Loony Lovegood?!" Malfoy was turning red in anger, offended by what he called her friend, Hermione smacked his arm "Give it a break Malfoy! You're not a child anymore you can't call her that!".

He turned to her and threw his hat to the ground "I'm in some kind of crazy world here! Clearly you feel like you belong you crazy muggleborn!".

His words made her raise her eyebrows, _Muggleborn? is that really all he's got? _

"Since you're such a grown man-child, why don't you go ahead and call me a mud-"

"Lovegood, how do we get out of here?!" he interrupted her, looking back to Luna. Hermione scoffed and crossed her arms "clearly, we have to finish the story and then we get to go home right?" she looked to her friend for reassurance but Luna quietly sipped on her tea "it's not going to be that easy Hermione, the Nargles will come back even if you finish the story".

"What?! Luna, as much as I love this place, I still have work to do, some due tomorrow!" the migraines were returning, she rubbed her temples again.

"You will return once the Nargles are gone Hermione," she smiled at her "same goes for you Draco" and with that, she disappeared.


	3. Chapter 3 : The White Rabbit

"What was that about?" Malfoy turned to Hermione "Granger?"

She stood quietly, frozen, still staring at where Luna had previously been sitting. The two were still singing their 'unbirthday' song.

"Granger?" Malfoy poked her shoulder and she snapped "I have work to do!" she threw her hands up, surprising him a bit "Dude dates tomorrow! papers to sign! files to organize! I can't handle this! this is procrastination! I don't have time for this! I don't even know what Nargles are! I searched every book I could find and nothing! she wouldn't leave me alone until I got rid of them but this is going too far!".

"Granger!" Malfoy grabbed her by the shoulders and shook her "Granger! Look at me!". Her eyes met his, she never really noticed how bright they were, normally they looked so dark and enclosed. Full of secrets, so mysterious.

"There you go" he said "frickin breathe Granger". Looking into his eyes, she could see something she had only seen once. Fear and Concern.

The only other time she had seen that in those eyes. She was being tortured in his home.

She inhaled and exhaled until the migraine was slowly fading.

"Okay Granger, what's the plan?" as he panicked for her, whatever anger he had had disappeared. Hermione thought for a while "let's just finish the story and deal with the whole Nargle thing afterwards".

"Story? Granger, you need to explain this to me. I have the right to know" Malfoy looked as panicked as she was. Looking at the situation in his eyes, it must be terrifying. She has knowledge on the situation so she can be as calm as possible but for him, everything is new and seeing his friends as crazy as that, not recognizing him and calling him different names, of course he would act like this.

_He deserves to know something._

"Okay, show me where the white rabbit went and I can explain everything on the way" she gave him a promising look, in hopes to calm him down and he did so. "Alright, he went that way" he pointed to the path going into the woods.

"Well Malfoy" she flashed him a soft smile "lead the way"

Once they were far enough from the Theo and Blaise, once they could no longer hear their voices, Hermione cleared her throat. "We're in a world called Wonderland" he looked at her, not a disbelieving look, but a look that wanted more information than that.

"It's a muggle story my mother read to me when I was younger. Its a fairytale that I enjoyed" she smiled "Its about a girl with a great imagination who followed a white rabbit into a whole new world, where everything was different and amazing". Hermione looked at him and realized that that wasn't the kind of information that would help him.

"Sorry, I got a bit carried away" he shook his head "It's alright Granger, just keep going"

"Anyways, her curiosity got her into so much trouble as she looked for the white rabbit thus leading her to the Red Queen, and I guess that's where we have to go" the thought of the red queen was quite horrifying. Looking at the drawing in the story book scared her even though she knew she didn't exist but now that they were there, she'd have to look at her in person.

"A muggle story huh? no wonder I've never heard of it" he paused "What about Theo- er- Nott and Zabini?" Malfoy asked, cringing at the scene from earlier.

"You can say Theo and Blaise" Hermione chuckled "they're part of a tea party, the wildest characters of the stories, your character was meant to be the craziest amongst them, hence, Mad Hatter". He laughed, not loudly, but in the most elegant way possible. It was better to listen to rathern than Ron's ungentlemanly laugh.

"So I'm guessing you're Alice?" he raised an eyebrow at her "curiosity and eagerness for knowledge and information meanwhile I'm the Mad Hatter".

"Can I ask you something Malfoy?"

"You're already asking a question"

"Okay then, what were you doing before waking up here?" she stopped walking and he chuckled at the thought.

"I was writing letters and I took surprisingly long on just one letter so I decided to rest my head before unknowingly writing some nonsense on the next letter. Afterwards, I heard Theo and Blaise, I wondered why they were in my study and when I looked up to yell at them, I wasn't in my study" he sighed "I tried asking them but they continued to call me mad. I tried my wand on them but it wasn't working. It was driving me crazy and then I heard you, I was desperately praying that you weren't like them. You wouldn't imagine the relief I felt when you called me by my name".

"I don't know why you were dragged into this mess Malfoy, but if it means anything. I'm sorry"

"It's not your fault, if it's anyone's fault, I'm guessing it's Lovegoods" Malfoy scoffed "how does she know this story anyway? isn't she a pureblood?"

Hermione blushed "that's where its my fault, I told her about the story and I'm guessing she put me in the story because she knew how happy it made me. I didn't think she'd actually put me in the story or put you also in it".

"Okay, so this Red Queen, is she some sort of hag or a sweet mother queen?" he changed the subject, hoping for the latter.

Hermione shivered in fear at the thought "let's say her favorite words are 'Off with your head' its best if we stay on her good side". "Geez, what kind of children's story is this? wait, why are you here Granger? what were YOU doing before waking up here?" he looked at her and crossed his arms.

"I was working" she answered very simply. No further explanations.

"Working? on what? It's way past work hours, last I checked it was almost midnight-"

"Well then Malfoy, what were YOU doing writing letters at almost midnight?"

He opened his mouth to speak but closed it again "They're letters long overdue, that's why I took so long just writing one".

"Who were they for-" she asked but he interrupted her

"There's the White Rabbit!" he pointed to the direction behind her and she turned almost immediately.

Seeing who was wearing the bunny ears she laughed.

_Who would've known that she'd make him be the white rabbit?_


End file.
